Saturday, October 22, 2016

Thank you so much for your kind thoughts...

I'm overwhelmed by the outpouring of kindness I'm seeing here and in various Facebook groups about my recent losses. Thank you so much for thinking about my tiny family in our hour of need. This last week has been harder than I thought thanks to the bureaucracy of death as we meet with this person or call that organization, and during all that it's been lovely to see your kind thoughts arriving in my inbox to remind me about what's really important. You really are the loveliest readers, and I am so grateful to have you and this blog!

I'll be back shortly as I need to write to keep my sanity. I'll be answering comments and, I hope, writing posts early next week again. I'm almost finished the e-zine for my Patreon accout, and I hope to take the last pictures for it on Sunday.

I know I've said it a hundred times but thank you so much for your kindness and generosity of spirit. Your compassion has made the most brutal month of my life less horrible.

Thank you, Michele, for the beautiful flowers. They are bringing happiness and lovely fragrances to our home. 

17 comments:

Jini Lopez said...

I am so sorry for your lost Susan. There are no words that can describe the pain... I hope you can find the strength you and your husband need to get through this difficult moment. Hold on to those special memories you have with her, cherish them with your heart, as they will always be with you and she will live for ever thru them...

Sincerely;

Jini Lopez.

Jemila Suleiman said...

Hello susan, am so sorry about the loss of ur mum. May God console u and the members of the family. God bless you for all the useful information and knowledge you are impacting on everyone that reads your blog. May God continue to bless you richly. Have a beautiful day. Cheer up dear

Natalie Maltais said...

I'm so sorry for your recent losses Susan. It's brutal to have so much piled on over
Such a short period of time. You and your family are in my thpughts and prayers.

NICOLE KENMILLE said...

I hope you find some comfort and sanity in your writing. I find keeping busy helps sometimes other times I break down in random places...went in for a dentist appt and I had a panic attack and was crying uncontrollably it was quite embarrassing for me because they thought it was just fear of the dentist but it was all piled up and in that moment it all chose to come out. I think about it now and have to laugh at the dentist and her assistant and wonder what was said about me as I left and how crazy I must have looked. I was unable to speak and explain why I had the meltdown so I'm sure they formed their own ideas lol. Anyway the meaning of that story is yes keep busy but not so busy that you aren't dealing with it. I thought I was but I guess I wasn't. Even morning I get up before everyone else and make my coffee and sit and think about memories with my dad and most morning I would cry but some I wouldn't so I thought it's getting easier. The whole dentist thing proved that so not true but I think about the jokes my dad would make up about this situation and how the dentists reacted and what they must have been thinking and I have to laugh. Because he would he found the funny in everything and always laughed and had everyone around him laughing constantly. Anyways I'm rambling on. I just want you to know you are not alone in this there are so many who have lost and can sometimes it helps to talk with them sometimes it don't but know that your readers are always here if you do need to talk. I'm always here if you even need to email me and talk. I hope your family has everything they need to adjust to this and keep living your life. I won't say move on because you never truly move on from something like this

Joyce Bonner said...

Susan, Out of respect for you and your family I have not posted my sincere regret for your loss, you need time to grieve and I wanted to give you that but know my thoughts and prayers are with you at this time. I lost my mom so I know how you feel, nothing or no one can take the place of her. Take the time you need, you are well loved and appreciated and all of ours thoughts, prayers and well wishes are going out to you and your family. We value all you do for us. We Love You

Living, Loving Life said...

I was so sorry to hear about your mother's death. I lost my dad a few years ago, Susan, so I know where you are. Even though he was sick, death was still a terrible shock. Allow yourself to grieve. It'll be a process, so reject any outside or internal influence to hurry it along. Take your time, take breaks, do whatever you have to do to stay centered.

My prayers are with you and your family!

firegirl said...

I am so very sorry for your loss, Susan! My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family at this very difficult time. Remember to be kind to yourself, even if you don't feel like it - you deserve it. And please don't worry about the blog as everyone understands. However, if you feel like writing something you can be sure in the knowledge that there are loads of readers out who care and appreciate all your hard work very much.

Anne

Valerie said...

I too am very sorry for the loss of your mother. I lost my dear sweet mother. I know your pain and sadness. My sincere condolences to you and your family during this difficult time.

Anamaria said...

Susan, I'm so sorry to hear about your loss, I pray so that you get the serenity to accept what cannot be changed, my deepest condolences for you and your family

Eli (Beauty Blog) said...

Dear Susan, I'm really sorry for your loss. I too lost my young brother three months ago, so I can somehow relate to your pain. Keep strong and give yourself time to grieve and cry whenever you need it. I don't know if you are a religious person but I'll keep you in my prayers.

Lise M Andersen said...

Many many thoughts coming your way from Copenhagen, Susan. Good idea about writing to keep your sanity.

Rose said...

Dear Susan
Sorry to hear of the loss of your mother. I understand this kind of sorrow. May you find comfort knowing that there are people holding you up in their prayers and thoughts. I lift you and your husband up in my prayers.

Mia Perdomo said...

Dear Susan
Some times things happend to us, and we don´t understand and probably never will, but time takes care of all the wounds. take care.

Joy said...

Hello Susan

Thank you so much for this blog it has been a great resource.

I have perused most of the carefully indexed pages looking for a basic serum formula. I am looking to try a very water thin translucent serum the likes of www.iloveskininc.com serums. However, the formulas I find are more like a very light lotion which is not what I'm looking for.

Also I happened accross www.shampyou.com and they have hair serum shots.

Would you possibly have a basic formula I could use these serums?

I would really appreciate your help.

Oh my! While typing this I see a post about your loss. I'm sorry, you are in my thoughts.

Joy

Cindy Lantier said...

I am so sorry, my dear new friend! I will say a prayer and think of you often. I hope you find some comfort in all the people who love you. If you need to talk, you know where I am! <3 <3 <3

Susan Barclay-Nichols said...

Thank you so much for all your wonderful thoughts. I admit I'm really struggling with getting through the day right now with all that's happened to our family. I miss my mom so much, and I can't believe my little Blondie isn't here. I've turned into someone who cries in public now, but I really don't care because I need to grieve my losses. I've been losing myself in writing, playing in my workshop, playing video games, teaching classes, and going to my youth groups and other things that recharge my batteries.

Nicole, although we've never met, I think about you often. I think we need to cry at the dentist and not care about what people think about it. Too many people throughout this process have looked at me funny or in terror when they see me cry - I'm talking about professionals at the hospital and people who came into my house, workers who should know how to deal with these things - and I've said to them many times that it's wonderful they don't feel the way I do right now. They will in the future - believe me, they all wanted to tell me how devsastated they'd be if something happened to their dogs even while my mother is dying - but they don't feel this pain today. And if they can't show a little empathy to someone like me who is so visibly in pain, then they're the unfortunate ones.

Hi Joy! Is it possible to post this in a more appropriate post? Thanks!

NICOLE KENMILLE said...

Well thank you Susan I too think about you and your family and hope you start having more good days than bad soon. It's so hard a ND it's a different process for everyone. For me it gets a little easier than its like it just happened again and I can't breath. It's been 56 days since he died and some days it's still like it just happened. We got a call that he was in hospital getting lifeflighted to a bigger better hospital which is an hour drive away so we were heading there and then got another call that they can't stabilize him and to get to our local hospital now so we changed course and we're heading there and my spouse got another call and said I'm sorry love he's already gone. I didn't get to say goodbye and I try to focus on the happy times I did have with him but that moment replays over and over so fresh and vivid in my mind. So I would like to say it gets easier and I hope it does but for me today it just keeps happening over and over and so it's not getting easier. Some days are easier but in that moment when it replays it is still the same and I have a feeling it will always be that way. So I try to not think of the actual moment in time when that happened and instead think about all the other memories I have with him. I was a daddies girl and his first child. My siblings were jealous because my dad and I were so close and used to joke that he was only MY Dad because when I referred to him I referred to him as my dad not "our dad" or "dad" it was always "MY dad". I was there with him through alot and he was always there for me no matter what I did. Even when I was a rebellious teenager he was there. Even as an adult when I backed away from him because of choices he made I didn't agree with he would be right there when I needed him. It's so hard to exist in a world where someone as close to you as that does not. So for you and for me and for everyone else that has felt that kind of loss I hope that we learn to focus more on the good memories and that we are strong enough to breath through the hard ones and keep going in life because that is all we can do. And not worry about what someone thinks when we break down in the middle of the grocery store or the dentists office. Just breath through it and try to shift our thoughts to a better memory and believe in the fact that when you are dead you are not truly gone because I don't think that I can do this if his beautiful soul is truly gone erased from this world